Dally's secret
by Lovetoread75
Summary: Johnny survived but Dally didn't know. Dally survived as well but couldn't face the gang without Johnny so he let everyone believe that he died and went back to New York. After 12 years he is forced to go back to Tulsa. He can't just show up so he disguises himself. When he finds out that Johnny is alive he decides to stay in Tulsa and get close to Johnny, full summary inside
1. Chapter 1

Summary:

Johnny survived but Dally didn't know. He believed that Johnny died. Dally survived as well, but he couldn't face the gang without Johnny. So he let everyone believe that he died and went back to New York. After 12 years he is forced to go back to Tulsa. He feels that he betrayed the gang and he can't just show up since everyone thinks he is dead so he disguises himself and gets a fake ID. When he finds out that Johnny is alive he decides to stay in Tulsa in his new identity and get close to Johnny and the gang without them knowing who he really is. Will Johnny and the gang figure out the truth or will Dally's secret remain with him? Read to find out.

Prologue

_Like soldiers march on_

_And if we make it through the night we'll see the sun_

_March on, march on_

The year was 1977 – twelve years passed since Johnny killed a soc and twelve years since Dally and Johnny were believed to have died. The thing was however they did not die. Johnny scared everyone but he went into a coma, and the doc was astonished to find out that he was alive. After a week he got better and was sent home. He walked with a limp due to his injuries.

Dallas' story was also not short of a miracle. After Dally was shot, one of the cops called the ambulance to make sure Dallas was dead. But they just loaded him up without checking. While in the ambulance he gained consciousness and they drove him to the hospital rather than a morgue.

Dallas was sure that Johnny died and he was mad that he survived. He couldn't face the gang again, to be with them without Johnny, to walk the same streets where they hung out, to go to the lot or the Dingo or drive-in, to play football or poker with the guys without Johnny, he would never do that. They thought he died and he'd like to keep it that way. So Dally thought that Johnny died and Johnny and the gang thought Dally died.

Dally went to New York and joined one of the gangs. He fought fiercely in gang fights and provided for himself by doing various odd jobs around the city from window washing to being a busboy, but there wasn't a day or a night for that matter that he hadn't thought of Johnny. It was difficult to sleep, and sometimes he dreamed of the church on fire, hearing Johnny's piercing scream "Help!" over and over again. So most of the time Dally was just glad to make it through the night.

The only connection to Tulsa Dally had, was his mother. He called her every now and then. She had walked out on him and his father, but Dallas couldn't even blame her for that. She left his father who was a drunk, and she couldn't afford to take Dallas with her. Dallas was an adult already anyway. Her new boyfriend hated Dallas, but Dallas didn't really care. He called him every now and then but never told him or his mother where he was living.


	2. Chapter 2

Dallas was sitting on a couch in his studio apartment in Brooklyn and smoking a cigarette, the smoke filling up the room. He finished it and went to the phone. He picked up the receiver and dialed his mother's number. Her boyfriend picked up. "It's Dally put my mother on the phone," Dally said reluctantly, and to Dally's surprise the boyfriend did not say anything rude, didn't call him a name like he usually did if he picked up Dally's calls. Instead he seemed to … choke up. He seemed incoherent, and Dallas didn't understand what he was saying. Finally he sobbed and said, "Your mother, Maggie… sob, she is dead."

"What?" Dallas snapped, tightening his grip on the receiver.

"Yeah," the boyfriend sobbed again, "it turns out she had very advanced stomach cancer."

"When?" Dally croaked, and his voice sounded low and raspy.

"The day before yesterday, the funeral is this Thursday." The boyfriend kept saying something else, but Dallas did not hear what he was saying. He left the receiver hanging and collapsed onto the couch. His hands were shaking as he lit up another cigarette and took a drag. Everything in front of his eyes was a blur as his eyes got misty.

Then the thoughts started racing through his mind. Should he go to the funeral? He wanted to, to pay final respects, to see her one last time. But he couldn't just show up, everyone thought he was dead. What if the gang finds out? How would he explain to them that he survived and didn't tell them, that he ran out on them, that he betrayed them, let them down. Also he couldn't even think of seeing the gang, but Johnny not being there. He couldn't face that. He tried to eradicate thoughts of Johnny as much as possible, but even though so much time had passed he still thought of Johnny on a daily basis.

However, Dally really wanted to go to the funeral. Then it occurred to him, he'll disguise himself. It's been twelve years, his physical appearance has changed a bit. He had multiple scars on his face that he got in gang fights and his shoulders got much broader and his whole frame much bigger. He will dye his hair and put some glasses on. Then he'd get a fake ID, they won't recognize him. Also his voice got deeper and raspier over the years, possibly due to smoking and drinking.

Immediately Dally went to implement his plan. He had only two days so he had to act fast. He was still shocked by the news, but his survival instinct kicked in, and he was able to get a hold of himself. He went to the pharmacy and got brown hair dye. His hair style was different from the one he had when he was in Tulsa twelve years ago. Dally dyed his hair. I look like an asshole, he thought looking at himself in the tiny bathroom mirror. By the evening he had a fake ID – Matthew Evans, he smiled looking it over.

As Dallas stepped on Tulsa ground he thought he was going to collapse. His heart was beating out of his chest, his hands were shaking. All the memories that he tried to shut down so much were now flashing in front of his eyes. The train station, here is where he dropped Johnny and Ponyboy off for them to go to Windrixville. All the streets he was walking on, the memories followed him like ghosts.

The funeral was early in the morning, around 10 a.m. The air was stuffy and humid, and Dallas found himself choking whether it was from the air or from seeing his mother in an open casket, he didn't know. There she was, in a white dress, hair done nicely, lipstick on her lips. Dallas couldn't watch, he covered his face with his palm.

There weren't that many people. Dallas was about to light up a cigarette when his mother's boyfriend walked up to him. He put his hand on Dally's shoulder. Dallas froze. He recognized me, he thought. The boyfriend spoke up, "Hi, I'm Will thank you for attending, how did you know the deceased?"

"I…," Dallas stumbled over his words a little and looked down, "I'm a friend."

"Well thank you." Dallas just nodded, he didn't trust himself to speak.

After the funeral Dallas felt emotionally drained. I need a drink, he thought. He knew the place well and started driving the car he had rented straight to the liquor store, hoping it was still there after twelve years.

Dallas got in line feeling his glasses moist because he was tearing up. What he saw next though made him nearly pass out. A beat up car pulled up by the store and none other than Two-bit climbed out. He was taller, a little on the fat side and he was spotting a beard, but Dally would recognize those rusty sideburns and dancing gray eyes from anywhere.

It seemed that there was another person in the car. Dally couldn't see who it was, then he heard the other person call out after Two-bit, "Why do you always have to buy booze?" As Dally heard the voice he thought he was going to die - it was Johnny's voice. There was no mistake about that. Dally peered outside, and what he saw made his knees buckle and made him lean on the wall for support. It was blasted Johnny. He still looked the same, even after all these years - jet black hair with the bangs going down to his eyes. Dallas felt his whole body tremble. "Son, are you ok?" an elderly gentleman who was behind him in line had asked, concern in his voice. Dally thought he was delirious, but he was sober. He blinked, and tears started streaming down his face. In the meantime Two-bit got in line.

Dally's first instinct was to run up to Johnny and squeeze the daylights out of him, but then he thought, I was away all this time, didn't write, didn't ask how they were, didn't let them know I was alive. I betrayed them, I let them down. They are not going to be happy to see me. Johnny clearly moved on. What Dallas did next was…

**Hope you enjoyed:)**


	3. Chapter 3

Dally ran out of the store, liquor forgotten and jumped into his car. Soon enough Two-bit exited the store and got in the driver's seat of his car. They started driving. Dally followed them. He wasn't sure why he was doing this, he didn't have a plan, but he just couldn't let Johnny slip away. He made sure to keep a distance so they did not suspect that he was following them. Soon enough they were at the stables on the outskirts. Johnny got out of the car. "I'll see you around," he shot at Two-bit and Two-bit drove away, while Johnny started walking towards the gates. Dally noticed that Johnny walked with a slight limp. He bit his bottom lip, so he works here, he thought driving away.

That night Dally didn't get a wink of sleep. He cried a lot, which was not the usual for him, and chain smoked. He was overwhelmed. He decided he'll get to know how the guys were doing, just make sure they were doing ok without revealing who he was and to find out if they moved on from his death. It's been twelve years they probably forgot about him by now.

By morning Dally knew one thing - he was going to go the stables and get a job there. He didn't have a plan, didn't know what he was going to do next but he knew he wanted, no needed to be close to Johnny. He'd start with working there and then he'd decide what to do next.

At about quarter to ten Dallas was entering the stables. Johnny was already there. "Where can I find the manager?" Dally asked trying to make sure his voice didn't tremble.

"In that booth over there," Johnny pointed a finger.

"Thank you."

Dallas went to the booth. He knocked on the door, and was prompted to come in. Inside there was a man probably in his forties. He was wearing a white t-shirt and blue jeans.

"Hi I'm Daniel how can I help you? Please take a seat." Dally took a seat. "I'm looking for a job, and I was wondering if you needed people," he said firmly, clenching his jaw. Daniel looked up from the papers on his desk. "Do you have any experience?" Dally was about to tell him that he was great with horses, but caught himself in time. "No sir, but I learn really fast," he ran his hand through his hair, "You see, I am new in town, and I don't have any means to provide for myself." Dally could sound pleasant when he wanted to, and right then he did.

"Where are you from, son?" The man asked, curiosity in his look.

"New York," Dally replied, looking the man right in the eyes feeling as if his life depended on it. His hope of being close to Johnny depended on it.

"New York? What brings you here to Tulsa?" Daniel continued. Dallas mentally cursed himself for not being prepared to answer this question.

"You see sir," he mumbled, sinking deeper into his seat, "my friend died, and I just couldn't stay there, I needed a change of scenery so here I am." This was ironic, because that was exactly what Dallas did when he thought that Johnny died.

"All right," Daniel said, "one of my workers just quit so I am going to give you a chance. If by the end of the next week you are doing well I'll let you stay. Do you have an ID?"

"Sure," Dallas handed him his fake ID.

"All right then… Matthew, let me introduce you to Jonathan." Dally's heart started beating faster again.

Daniel led him outside, and to the stalls where Johnny was washing one of the horses. "Alright Matthew, this is Jonathan. He will explain to you what needs to be done and how to do it. Jonathan, this is Matthew he is starting with us today, to replace Alex. Please show him around and explain what needs to be done."

"Sure sir," Johnny nodded, and Daniel walked away.

"So have you ever worked with horses?" Johnny asked, soaking a cloth in a bucket of water.

"No," Dally shook his head. He was feeling like he was in a daze, like any minute his knees would buckle and he would collapse onto the ground. It took all his effort to conceal what he was feeling in that moment.

In the meantime Johnny continued, "Well, we feed them four times a day, wash them twice a day, get hay for them, clean the stalls at least twice a day and prepare them for the rides."

"The rides?" Dallas sounded confused.

"Yeah," Johnny replied, "we host daily rides for the little kids, that's how we make money." Dallas was silent.

"Is there a problem?" Johnny looked up at Dallas, furrowing his eyebrows.

"A problem?" Dally frowned, "No it's just that I … I don't like little kids, I just don't like them." The moment Dally said that, Johnny looked at him like he'd seen a ghost. Dallas realized his mistake, he swallowed hard, "I mean… to have of my own, but I'm ok with giving rides."

"Ok," Johnny managed, "Let me show you how to wash a horse. This here is Misty, and we are going to wash her. You always walk up from the front, never from the back. If you walk up from the back the horse will kick you with her legs." "Ok," Dally nodded playing dumb.

Johnny soaked a cloth in a bucket of water once again, and started washing the horse. "Now you try it, be careful the horse is seeing you for the first time, she is not used to you." He passed the cloth to Dally.

"Ok," Dally started carefully washing the horse, thinking of how many times he'd done it while jockeying for Buck. The horse made a funny sound and started nibbling on the collar of Dally's jean jacket. Johnny smiled, "she likes you. Are you sure you've never done this before, you are doing really well."

"My first time," Dally managed. Just being so close to Johnny he was overwhelmed. He tried to conceal what he was feeling as much as possible, trying to make sure his hands didn't tremble and his voice was steady.

"We have fifteen horses to take care of so pick up the pace a little." Johnny prompted, soaking another cloth in the bucket and starting to wash the other horse.

"Ok," Dally croaked, avoiding Johnny's gaze.

It was around 2 p.m. when they finished washing the horses. "Lunch time," Johnny announced, wiping his hands with a clean cloth. He went into the pantry area and took a sandwich out of the fridge. "It's too far to go to a diner from here so I just bring my food."

"Oh," Dally said.

"Here," Johnny gave him half of his sandwich. They sat down on the bench and started eating.

"So where are you from?" Johnny asked taking a bite of his sandwich.

"New York," Dally, replied, wiping the sweat off his forehead, desperately hoping that Johnny doesn't notice that he was sweating.

"What brings you here?" Johnny asked, curiosity in his look. Dally gave him the same story that he gave Daniel that his friend passed away and he needed a change of scenery. Johnny was silent for a long time after that, and Dally wondered if he was remembering him, but he didn't say anything not to blow his cover. "Are you married? Do you have a family?" Dally asked.

"Yeah," Johnny replied grinning, "to the best girl in the world. No kids though, not yet." Dally smiled. It warmed his heart to see Johnny doing so well - having a life and a job, a family. He wondered briefly what happed that night in the hospital when they were sure that Johnny died, but in all honesty he didn't even care just as long as he was seeing his friend well and alive.

A week passed by, Dally rented a room on the poor side of town. Him and Johnny were getting along really well. They fed the horses and washed them. And they were bonding all over again. "Your turn to clean the poop," Johnny said to Dally laughing, on Friday afternoon right before lunch.

"I cleaned it last time," Dally protested, giving Misty a carrot.

"No I did," Johnny laughed.

"Fine, be like that." Dally grabbed a hose and turned the water on. He then pointed it at Johnny. It was Spring and it was pretty hot out, so Johnny just laughed as the water reached him, soaking his clothes. After a while Dally stopped.

"You are still cleaning the poop," Johnny announced, moving a haystack to where the horses could reach it. Dally rolled his eyes.

Dally and Johnny were sitting on the bench chewing on their sandwiches when Johnny spoke up. "So you are new in town you must be bored. Let me introduce you to my friends. The races are next Sunday, some of our horses will participate so we have to be there anyway, but my friends will be there as well so I'll introduce you. Dallas swallowed hard, "sure, thanks."


	4. Chapter 4

The following Sunday was a beautiful, warm, Spring day. The sun was shining and there was a warm spring breeze in the air. Johnny and Dallas were at the tracks with four of their horses. The jockeys were getting ready, and in the meantime Dally and Johnny were keeping an eye on the horses. Dally felt dizzy and nauseous. He was there, he was actually there, the very place he used to jockey some twelve years ago. He realized how much he missed the pace. All the memories were flashing in front of his eyes.

Soon enough he saw a guy walk by, he was spotting a beard and his hair was messy and unkempt. He was chewing on a toothpick and when he passed by Johnny and Dally he nodded slightly at Johnny. Dallas looked closely at the guy and it dawned on him, it was Buck. Dally felt a lump in his throat. Johnny looked at him funny, "are you ok Matt? You look awful pale." Dally didn't trust himself to talk, he swallowed hard. "Yeah, it's just I'm new to all this, I'm a little overwhelmed."

"Oh," Johnny chuckled, "don't worry about it, you'll get used to it just fine."

At that time the jockeys walked into the area and took the horses. "C'mon," Johnny prompted, "I'll introduce you to my friends." He led Dallas to the bleachers where he saw Darry, Soda, Pony, Steve and Two-bit.

Surprisingly they looked almost the same as twelve years ago. Darry was spotting a few gray hairs even though he was only in his thirties. Pony had matured and had broad shoulders and a different haircut and no grease in it. And Dally assumed he was taller though he couldn't see since Pony was sitting down. Steve had a different haircut as well, and Soda changed the least out of the group.

There were some women sitting with them – wives and girlfriends Dally assumed. In the meantime Johnny walked over to Darry. "Hi Dar, I brought my friend Matt, remember I told you about him, he's working with me, he's from New York." "Nice meeting you," Darry stretched his hand out.

'Get it together, get it together' Dally mentally told himself.

"Matthew," he shook Darry's hand. The minute he got in contact with Darry's hand he literally thought he was going to faint.

"This is my wife, Alison," Darry said, "and this is my daughter Ashley,"  
he put his hand on the shoulder of the little girl sitting on his lap, "say hi, Ashley." "Hi" she waved her hand and smiled shyly.

"Hi," Darry's wife smiled at Dallas, "nice meeting you,"

"Same here," Dally forced himself to say. She was pretty, with long,

wavy black hair and shiny blue eyes. Darry did good, Dallas thought. Then Johnny introduced him to the rest – "this is Ponyboy and his girlfriend Jenna." They both smiled and shook Dally's hand. "This is Steve and his wife Evie," Johnny continued the introduction. Dally actually recognized Evie she had a small but visible baby bump, so they made it after all Dally thought, and now Steve is going to be a father. Then he looked at Two-bit who had one hand around his girlfriend's shoulder and in the other hand he was holding a beer can and sipping beer. Some things never change, Dally thought and it almost made him smile. "This is Keith, who we call Two-bit, and his girlfriend Christina." She looked a little older than Two-bit, but she had a nice smile. She looked affectionately at Two-bit. Way to go man, Dally thought smiling in spite of himself. Now Dally felt overwhelmed for real. In the meantime Johnny continued, "This here is Sodapop and his fianceé Tiffany," Dally looked up at Soda, who had a goofy smile on his face. It looked so familiar. Dally felt a lump in his throat. "And this is Laura my wife," Johnny looked at her affectionately and she smiled and winked at him, "Nice to meet you," she shook Dally's hand, smiling. She was pretty, Dally thought – long wheat color hair and nice, friendly brown eyes. By the way her eyes were shining when she was looking at Johnny you could tell she really loved him and cared about him.

"Ok, they are about to start," Two-bit piped in. Everyone got quiet waiting for the races to start. Finally it started. Dallas was on the edge of his seat, he felt as if it was him out there on the horse. He would give anything to do that again. Johnny got up from his seat and was cheering loudly for Misty and their other horses. The rest of the guys were cheering too. Dally remembered how when he raced they always cheered for him. Right then he regretted his decision to move to New York, but he thought Johnny was dead, and there was no way he could've faced the guys back then. He sighed deeply, and Darry shot him a look. Dally managed to smile at him.

At the end of the race Buck's horse won. Still can't beat him, Dally smiled to himself. Darry's words interrupted his thoughts, "We are going to Dairy Queen for dinner would you like to join us?" In that one second Dally felt cold sweat form on his spine and his palms.

"Shouldn't we get the horses back to the stables?" he looked at Johnny, hoping for an excuse not to go.

"Oh, the jockeys can do that, you don't have to worry about that." Johnny replied getting up. Dally was put on the spot, "Ok, I guess I'll go with you," he said reluctantly, his eyes wide.

They all piled up into Darry's truck, and he drove them to Dairy Queen. On the way they were still discussing the races. The radio was on, and they were trying to yell over the music. Johnny was saying that Misty was so close to winning, apparently she won last time. Dally was silent and just tried to keep his composure. A few times he had caught Darry staring at him in the rearview mirror. Shit, Dally thought, I hope he didn't recognize me. It would be the end of me if he did.

Finally they were there. They ordered, and Two-bit was telling them something. Apparently, he worked as an EMT, and he was telling them some story about it. Soda was whispering something in Tiffany's ear, and Pony was talking to his girlfriend. Darry and his wife were listening to Two-bit.

Dally couldn't even make himself listen to what Two-bit was saying, all he thought and felt was how him, Pony and Johnny went to Dairy Queen in Windrixville. "So how do you find Tulsa so far?" Johnny, who noticed Dally's uneasiness asked.

"Oh, it's very different from New York." Dally replied searching his pockets for a cigarette.

"I bet it is," Johnny took a sip of his coke, "How is it in New York? I wish to visit it one day."

"Oh, it's always busy," Dally took a drag, "the streets are always crowded and there is always traffic no matter the time of day or night."

"Are there gangs?" Jonny found himself asking.

"Yeah, there are. I've been with some of them." Before Johnny could think it slipped his tongue, "is that how you got your scars?" Dally looked startled for a moment, but then cleared his throat and said, "Yes. What about here, any gangs?"

"Not really," Johnny was thoughtful for a moment, "It's more about rich versus poor. It was really bad when I was younger. We constantly fought with the rich kids from the West side of town. It's better now. I mean we don't have physical fights but they still look down on us, and we pretty much hate them still." Dallas nodded, "I understand."

On Monday after they were done working Johnny looked up at Dally from under his bangs and asked, "Would you like to learn how to ride? I bet you haven't done that in New York." Dallay almost laughed, but he was thrilled to be spending time with Johnny. "No, the only thing I rode in New York was my motorcycle." Dally chuckled.

"That's tuff," Johnny admired, and the expression on his face was exactly how Dallas remembered when he used to talk to him.

"So, let me show you," Johnny walked over to the horse. He was moving fast in spite of the fact that he was limping. "So first put your foot into stirrup like this, and get into the saddle," Johnny instructed. Dallas did as told. "Now pull the reins just a little so that she is just walking, and if you want her to gallop pull more, like this." Dallas couldn't resist, he pulled the reins, and the horse started running - the wind brushing against Dally's hair and skin. God, but he missed it.

"You are a natural," Johnny yelled after him, "are you sure you haven't done this before?" Johnny pulled the reins on his horse, and now Dally and him were galloping side by side.

"Try and catch me," Johnny laughed, pulling the reins some more, getting ahead of Dallas.

"No problem," Dallas chuckled. He felt so free and happy in that moment. It seemed like all the troubles were gone. He pulled the reins, and now was ahead of Johnny.

"Maybe you should get yourself in one of the races," Johnny chuckled, releasing the reins so his horse stopped.

"Maybe I will," Dally laughed. He stopped his horse too, and the two of them got on the ground. Dally took out a pack of Kools and lit up. It didn't go unnoticed by Johnny. "You know," he said while walking Misty back to the stall, "I had a friend from New York once, you remind me of him a whole lot." Dally held his breath, "what happened?" Dally almost choked up.

"He died," Johnny said and there was no joy left in his face from the moments ago. He looked down and said barely audible, "I would give anything to see him alive." Dallas was silent a moment then he cleared his throat and said in a raspy voice, "but wouldn't that mean he betrayed you?" Johnny looked him right in the eyes and there was such sadness and defeat in his eyes. "I don't care if he betrayed me. I just want him alive." Then he shook his head, "sorry, I didn't mean to go all depressing on you."

"Oh, it's nothing," Dallas managed, feeling a lump in his throat.

When Dallas got home that evening he smoked one cigarette after another, silent tears streaming down his face. Johnny's words playing over and over in his mind – "I would give anything to have my friend alive." Dally felt broken, but blessed at the same time. He couldn't believe it, he was spending time with Johnny, _his_ Johnny. He felt bad for lying to him, but he was relieved to know that Johnny didn't forget about him, that he still cared.


	5. Chapter 5

On Friday night before closing up Johnny turned to Dally and asked, "What are you doing tonight?"

"Not sure, probably hit the bar." Dally replied, searching his pockets for a cigarette.

"Oh," Johnny said, turning the key in the lock, "we are having poker night at my house if you'd like to join, there will be drinks too." Dally was silent for a moment. He was curious to see Johnny's house. "Yeah, ok," he nodded. They closed up and went to the car.

When they arrived at Johnny's house Laura met them. She gave Johnny a peck on the cheek and then turned to Dallas, "It's nice to see you again." Dallas nodded in response. He walked in, the guys weren't there yet. Dally looked around and froze - there on the shelf was a framed picture of the gang, Johnny and Dally in the middle. He looked away and his gaze fell on top of the TV. There on top of the TV was a picture of Dallas in a black frame. Jonny walked in and noticed Dally looking at the picture. "That's the friend I told you about, the one that died."

"Oh," was all Dally said. He was moved – Johnny didn't forget about him. He even had his picture up. He felt tense and hoped to get a drink soon to help him relax a bit.

Soon the rest of the guys arrived. There was noise and laughter, and Dally found himself relax a little. Looking at his picture in a black frame his first instinct was to run to Johnny and tell him the truth about who he was, but a voice inside was telling him 'traitor,' Johnny will never forgive you, he won't have anything to do with you. So Dally decided that it was better to be "dead" but loved rather than alive and hated.

"I need a drink," Two-bit's voice interrupted Dally's thoughts. "Me too," Dally said before he even thought about it.

"Oh yeah?" Laura laughed, "What's your favorite drink Matt?" Dally was silent then he remembered - Matt that's him. "Captain Morgan," he replied, taking a seat on the couch.

"Strong stuff," Laura laughed again. In the meantime it didn't escape Johnny that Captain Morgan was Dally's favorite drink. He felt weird first Kools and now Captain Morgan. Just a coincidence he told himself.

The guys started playing. Darry won the first two rounds. After that Johnny won one, and then the next round all the guys were out, and it was only Dally and Johnny left. "I beat you," Dally smiled. He had a few more Captain Morgans and was finally able to relax.

"Try me," Johnny smiled, and placed four Aces on the table. Dally laughed, folding his cards, "fine I'll get you next time." They kept playing, and for the next few rounds Dally and Johnny were the last ones left playing. Dally won one, and Johnny two. Johnny felt weird - how many times he sat like that across from Dallas playing poker. Just the two of them left.

Finally, Dally raised his hands in defeat, "Fine, you got me. I'm going for a smoke." He had a few more Captain Morgans along the way. Dally got up and went out on a porch and lit up. Johnny didn't know why, but something was telling him to follow Dallas. He walked out and sat down next to Dally and lit up. Dally took a long drag on his cigarette and looked at Johnny. "Your house is nice, so is your wife," he said, "You did good Johnny." Johnny's eyes got huge, he could've sworn it was Dally's voice, and he called him "Johnny". Dally caught himself, he shouldn't have drank this much, he thought. "Sorry," he tried to cover up his mistake, "I meant Jonathan, I had a friend back in New York whose name was Johnny." Johnny was silent just nodded. Could it be, he thought, was it possible that this was … Dallas? He then mentally cursed himself for thinking that. Dallas was dead, Dallas would never do that to him - pretend to be someone else.

Johnny was going to say something, but at this moment the door opened a crack, and Soda stuck his head out. "We are playing another round are you in?"

"Sure," Dally replied trying to change the uncomfortable situation.

"Yeah, ok" Johnny nodded, getting up.

They played a few more rounds, watched TV a little, and then the guys started leaving. "I better get going," Dally said to Johnny.

"Thanks for coming, I'll see you Monday," Johnny replied, taking a few dirty glasses and bringing them into the kitchen.

As Dallas was driving back his thoughts were gloomy. He hated what he was doing, hated pretending, but as before he thought it's better to be "dead" and loved than alive and hated.


	6. Chapter 6

_Searching for the meaning_

_Living in this feelings_

_Ready for the reason to believe_

On Monday Dally was moving a haystack when Daniel walked up to him. He had some papers and a pen in his hands. "Hi Matthew," he said to Dally. "Hello," he replied. "So your probation period is over, I'm making it official that you work here. Here is some paperwork you need to fill out. Let Jonathan look it over when you are done, to make sure there are no errors, and you filled out everything correctly."

"Thank you sir," Dallas smiled in spite of himself. He enjoyed working here and of course most importantly spending time with Johnny. Dally quickly filled out the forms. He then gave the papers to Johnny to look over. Johnny took the papers, and as he looked at them he took a step back and took a seat on the bench as his knees buckled - this was Dally's handwriting. He knew it and he could recognize it from anywhere. Could it be, was it some sort of nasty joke. "Are you ok Jonathan?" Dally's voice interrupted Johnny's thought.

"You know, as a matter of fact I'm not. I think I'm getting a cold or something. I think I'm going to call it a day. Will you be ok on your own?" Johnny's voice was barely audible, and his eyes were huge.

"Sure, what about these?" Dally pointed at the filled out paperwork.

"Oh these," Johnny stuttered, "they are good, you can give them to Daniel."

"Ok, I'll see you tomorrow Jonathan, get some rest." Dally called out as he got up and started walking towards the booth to give the papers to Daniel. Johnny couldn't speak he was speechless. On shaky legs he made it to his car.

When Johnny got home he plopped on the bed and lit up a cigarette. He inhaled deeply. Could it be, could it actually be Dallas, but why would Dallas pretend to be someone else? Johnny felt like he was going crazy, but that handwriting there was no denying it. Sure people could have the same favorite brand of cigarettes and the same favorite drink, but handwriting - that's unique to each person. Johnny could barely wait for the evening for Pony to get home from work. He even considered calling him up at work but decided that he needed to talk about this in person.

Finally it was 7 p.m. Johnny dialed Pony's number, "Hi Pony, it's me. Listen man I need to talk to you about something really important can I come over? I know you are probably tired after work, but this is really serious man."

"Johnny, of course you can come over, is everything ok? What's going on?"

"I'll tell you when I get there." Johnny swallowed hard. There was silence on the other end, Pony was definitely puzzled by Johnny's outburst.

"Ok I'll see you," Johnny said and hung up the phone.

When Johnny arrived, Pony met him in the doorway. "What's wrong? You are scaring me," he motioned for Johnny to walk in. Johnny walked in and took a seat on the couch, and Pony took a seat next to him. Johnny lit up and took a drag. Pony took a sip of his Pepsi. "What do you think of Matt?" Johnny blurted out between drags.

"I think he's fine," Pony shrugged, "a little weird it's like something is bothering him all the time, but tell me what's going on, you surely didn't come here to talk about Matt."

"That's exactly why I came here," Johnny replied, looking Pony right in the eyes. He paused and took a drag, "I think… I think it's Dallas." Pony chocked on the Pepsi he was sipping. "What?"

"Yeah, I think it's Dallas, and for some reason he is pretending to be someone else." Johnny's voice was shaking as he spoke, and he raised his voice a little. "Johnny…" Ponyboy started.

"I'm telling you man. First he has the same favorite cigarettes then drink then…" Johnny took another drag, and Pony noticed that his hand was shaking.

"Johnny," Pony interrupted, "do you know how many people smoke Kools and drink Captain Morgan."

"I know, I'm not done yet," Johnny raised his voice. "The other day he gave me a ride, and he drives the way Dally did."

"So he likes to speed when he's driving so what." Pony said reluctantly.

"And today at work I saw his handwriting, it's Dally's I'm telling you man. I almost lost it when I saw it. A lot of people can have the same favorite drink but not the same handwriting." Johnny said with finality, and turning visibly pale.

Pony was thoughtful for a little while, "are you sure?"

"Absolutely. And there is one more thing - the other night when we were sitting on the porch he out of the blue called me 'Johnny'. I think he had too many Captain Morgans, and let his guard down a little." Johnny was looking up at Pony from under his bangs, eyes glistening, hoping Pony would believe him. Pony was silent he didn't know what to make out of all this. "He doesn't look like Dally," he frowned, flicking the ashes from his cigarette.

"No," Johnny sighed, "but time can change someone's appearance, plus he could change his hair color and stuff."

"I still think you are overreacting." Pony shook his head, "I mean I miss Dally too, we all do, but why would he be pretending to be someone else? He wouldn't want to hurt us like that."

"I dunno," Johnny sighed again, "but I sure will find out."

"I dunno," Pony said knowingly, "I just don't want you to get your hopes up." Johnny was silent for a moment then his eyes lit up. "I know," he exclaimed grinning. Pony just gave him a puzzled look.

"Dally has a birthmark," Johnny continued.

"What?" Pony said confused.

"Dally has a birthmark just above his left knee. It's of a weird shape. It kinda looks like a star."

"How do you even know these things?" Pony raised his eyebrows.

"I spent a lot of time with Dallas," Johnny replied. "Now I just have to get him to wear shorts. He always wears jeans never shorts." Pony raised his eyebrows even more. Johnny cleared his throat, "do me a favor, don't tell any of the guys or they will think I have lost my mind."

"Ok, sure thing Johnny." Pony grinned.

"Listen," Johnny said, "I'm sorry I dumped all this on you but I just had to get it off my chest. When I saw that handwriting I thought I was going to pass out."

"Sure thing," Pony said again. With that Johnny left.

That night Pony gave Soda a call. "Hello," Soda's sleepy voice answered the phone.

"Hi Soda it's me. Sorry to wake you, but I need to talk to you."

"Well, shoot."

"It's about Johnny. I'm worried about him."

"What's wrong?" Soda asked, concern in his voice.

"He… um he thinks that Matt is really Dally."

"What? What do you mean?" Soda was completely caught off guard.

"He asked me not to tell anyone, but he thinks Matt is really Dally pretending to be Matt."

"Oh, poor Johnny," Soda sighed, "he never really did get over Dally's death, but why would he think that?"

"Something about he saw his handwriting and it's the same as Dally's. That and he has the same favorite cigarettes and drink as Dallas."

"Ok Pone, I'm glad you told me. We are going to keep an eye on Johnny."

"Thanks Soda."

"No problem, bye now."

A few weeks passed by, and Johnny still wasn't sure if Matt was really Dallas. He thought he was going crazy - Dallas died right? But everything told him otherwise. He and Matt became really close, and Johnny felt like he was spending time with Dallas. Dally still wore only jeans never shorts so Johnny couldn't see if he had the birthmark above his knee.

Easter was just around the corner. "So what are you doing this Sunday?" Johnny asked Dallas on Friday as they were closing up.

"Hit the bar as always," Dally replied, turning the key in the lock, not even giving it a second of thought. Johnny cleared his throat and looked down, "it's Easter."

"Oh," Dally managed, "I didn't realize that."

"So," Johnny stumbled over his words a little, "I was thinking … maybe … um you'd like to go to church with us." Dallas snorted, "I am not exactly the churchgoing type." And again Johnny thought of Dallas.

"Well, if you decide to go let me know," he mumbled, getting his car keys out of his pocket and starting to walk towards the car.

That night Dally couldn't fall asleep, he didn't fall asleep easily these days at all. But this time it was even worse. He kept wondering about Johnny. He couldn't believe it – Johnny was alive. He didn't even care how it happened though he was curious, but the main thing was he was alive. Then a thought that seemed so strange to him entered his mind - what if God exists. He mentally laughed at his own stupidity, but there it was again, what if there actually was a God, what if he saw how miserable Dallas was without Johnny and brought him back. Easter, he thought, the celebration of Jesus' resurrection, and to him Johnny was resurrected, he came back from the dead. So maybe God did this for him, maybe he gave him Johnny back. But then gloomy thoughts entered his mind, why would God do something nice for him, Dallas Winston. He never honored God, never went to church, he drank too much and his lifestyle was not exactly godly, yet he couldn't help it but think that God brought Johnny back, and it was truly a miracle. But if God wanted a miracle why did he allow Dallas to think that Johnny was dead all these twelve years, why did he let him suffer?

It was 9 a.m. the following Saturday. Dally got up with a headache after the night when he didn't sleep even for ten minutes. But at the moment he didn't care about that. He dialed the number, "hello,"

"Jonathan, it's Matt, I'd… like to go to church with you." Dally was staring at the receiver, and his own voice didn't sound right to him. There was silence on the other end of the line - Johnny lost his ability to speak

"… if that's ok?" Dally added shortly.

"Oh, Matt of course that's ok. So meet me at my house tomorrow around 9 and we'll go from there."

"You got it," Dallas replied realizing that he was holding his breath.

He washed up, and plopped back on the bed a cigarette between his lips. I'm losing my mind, he thought, me Dallas Winston going to church and out of my own will too, nobody is forcing me.

Dally finished his cigarette. He felt restless. They wear nice clothes to church don't they, probably suits. I don't own a suit nor do I like putting one on. He went to his closet and started looking through things. Finally, he found a white button down shirt and a pair of black slacks. This will have to do and even under a gun point I am not wearing a tie.

The next day he was driving to Johnny's house dressed up, and feeling weird about it. He had butterflies in his stomach and was smoking one cigarette after another to calm his nerves. He hadn't slept the night again, and hardly ate anything, just smoked. So he felt antsy and on edge.

Finally, he arrived. On shaky legs he walked up to the door and rang the bell. Johnny opened the door. He was wearing a suit. "Oh, hi Matt, please come in." Dallas walked in. The guys were already there, all wearing suits, even Steve. Dallas almost waited for some sort of remark about him being underdressed but no one said anything. "Would you like some pancakes?" Johnny asked smiling, "We still have some time before leaving."

"No, I'm fine," Dallas managed and his voice was strained.

"Well, then take a seat," Johnny motioned towards the couch, and Dally took a seat. He felt extremely stupid, and wished they would just leave already.

Soon they arrived. It was a pretty small church painted white on the exterior with a large cross on the top. All of the sudden it flashed before Dally's eyes - the church and it was on fire. Johnny's voice "help" Dally held his breath. No, this isn't happening, he tried to calm himself down. "Matt, is everything ok?" Dally looked up - it was Darry. He was staring at him intensely.

"Oh, sorry," Dallas mumbled, he didn't realize he was blocking the way for the rest of the guys to walk in.

Finally they were seated. The pastor started the sermon. He talked about the meaning of Easter and Jesus coming back from the dead. And all Dallas could think of was Johnny returning from the dead. He was not really paying attention to what the pastor was saying and was lost in his own thoughts.

Then the pastor said "Jesus suffered on the cross before being raised so we must suffer in our life before getting our miracle." That caught Dally's attention. The pastor continued "when we are suffering we realize that we need God. We realize that we can't achieve our goals on our own we need God to help us." Dally gasped, this was answering his question about why God let him suffer for all these twelve years. Then the pastor said, "it may be a mystery to you how you found yourself here today, maybe you weren't planning on it, but God works in mysterious ways." and it seemed to Dally that the pastor was looking right at him while he was saying that.

"So," the pastor finally said, "before we leave if some of you need a prayer today raise your hand," Before he knew it Dally raised his hand.

"Yes young man," the pastor said pointing at Dallas.

"I'd like to thank God for giving me something, actually someone back that I thought I lost a long time ago." Dally felt all sorts of weird, he never got emotional like that, well maybe just once, and that was the day Johnny died.

"I haven't seen you around here before, young man," the pastor said.

"I'm new in town," Dallas replied his voice shaking. He mentally cursed himself for that. Why was he getting so emotional?

"Well, welcome to our church and It'd be my honor to pray for you." Dally didn't see it, but Johnny nudged Pony in the ribs, and looked at him with huge eyes. Pony just shrugged in return. In the meantime the pastor was saying a prayer for Dallas.

After church Dallas felt like he just wanted to run. He didn't want to see anyone, and he was cursing himself for asking for the prayer. What was he thinking? What if they start suspecting something about who he really was.

"Would you like to go for lunch with us?" Johnny's voice interrupted Dally's thoughts.

"No," he almost jumped, then added "I have some things I need to take care of."

"Ok, I'll see you tomorrow at work." Dallas barely nodded, jumping into his car, lighting a cigarette and driving off.


	7. Chapter 7

The following Sunday Darry had barbeque at his house. All the guys were there, and Johnny brought Matt, well Dally, along. Darry still lived in the same house they lived in when they were growing up.

It was a beautiful, sunny Spring day, just perfect for spending time outside. As Dally arrived he was overwhelmed by emotions. All the memories of spending time in this house were flashing in front of his eyes. His heart started beating faster and sweat was pouring down his spine. He felt like he was seventeen again, and Darry was going to get his guitar and sing, and then they all will go to the lot to play football.

Dally's mind was racing. He looked around and realized that everyone was doing something even if it was just talking. He, on the other hand, was just standing awkwardly in the middle, not doing anything. His gaze fell on Darry, who was by the grill flipping the burgers. He remembered how he always used to help Darry with the burgers whenever they had barbeque. He was tempted to go up to him and offer help. Beats just standing here all by myself, he thought.

So he approached Darry, "Do you need help?" Darry smiled, "sure, I can use some help," Darry moved over some, making space for Dally. Dally walked up closer and started putting some burgers on the grill, while flipping the ones that were on the grill already. Flipping the burgers Dally felt like it was all those years ago, he felt like his old self. He considered once again telling everyone the truth, but once again decided against it. This struggle of telling or not telling the truth was something Dallas dealt with every single day.

In the meantime Darry looked up at Dallas from the grill, "So how do you find Tulsa? I bet it's a lot different than New York."

"'Yeah, it's different, but I can get used to that." Dally put his spatula over a small flame that appeared on the grill.

"What part of New York are you from?" Darry asked, curiosity in his voice.

"Brooklyn, born and raised" Dally replied firmly, wiping the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand.

"Oh, we had a friend from Brooklyn when we were growing up," Darry said, and there was sadness in his eyes.

"Yeah Jonathan told me." Dally bit his bottom lip and felt sweat dripping down his spine - was Darry suspecting something? Meanwhile Darry continued flipping a burger, "So what made you pick Tulsa?" Dally was caught totally off guard. He was silent, and Darry shot him a weird look. "Oh, nothing special. Just woke up one day and thought let me go to Tulsa," Dally stumbled over his words a little, he thought Darry definitely suspected something. It didn't escape Darry that Matt was acting weird. Darry thought that something was definitely wrong and something was bothering Matt. At first Darry didn't really care, he just thought Matt was a little weird, but now that Johnny seemed to make friends with Matt and started bringing him around Darry decided that he would find out what the deal was with Matt, he didn't want Johnny to get close to him and then get hurt.

They ate, and Dally got to talk to Pony and Jenna a little. Apparently Pony was working as a social worker. He just started recently. He lived with his girlfriend Jenna still on the East side of town.

So everyone was talking and socializing when Soda went inside. In a few minutes he was back - a cake in hands. He carefully set the cake on the table. "Made it this morning," he said proudly. It was vanilla-chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. Soda started cutting the slices. Dally felt a lump in his throat. He got his slice and took a bite. It was extremely sweet – some things never change. Dally felt choked up, and the cake got stuck in his throat. He willed himself to get it together, but in the corner of his eye he saw Darry looking at him weird.

Dally was about to say something, but at this moment Two-bit turned the radio on, and started dancing with his girlfriend. The girls giggled, and after a while everyone was dancing except for Dally. "We oughtta find you a girl Matt," Two- bit laughed, while trying to catch his breath after jumping all over the place. Dally sighed. He had a girlfriend here in Tulsa. He wondered briefly what she was up to now. He was sure she moved on after his "death", married now, probably with kids. "Did you leave one behind in New York?" Two-bit's words interrupted his thoughts, "a wife maybe." Dally cleared his throat, "We broke up just before I left."

"I could see how that could happen," Two- bit chucked. "Well, you stick with me, we'll find you one in no time," he chuckled again.

"Sure," Dally forced a smile.

At the end of the night Darry did grab his guitar and started singing. Dally felt he was going to lose it. "I better get going," he said in haste, his voice hoarse. "I have some things to take care of." He had to leave or he would break down. Darry looked at his watch - it was 9 p.m. what could Matt possibly need to do at 9 p.m. but he thought it would be rude to ask so he just let it go.

Later that night Soda was helping Darry to clean up as he brought dirty dishes inside and placed them in the sink, he looked up at Darry and asked "what do you think of Matt?" Darry turned to face Soda, "he's fine, just a little weird."

Soda frowned, "How do you mean?" he furrowed his eyebrows.

Darry shrugged, "It's like something is bothering him, like he's hiding something. Yeah, that's it he's acting weird, why do you ask?" Soda considered telling Darry about what Pony told him, that Johnny thought Matt was really Dally, but he decided against it. Johnny asked to keep it a secret so he should honor his wish.

"No reason," he said shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot, "I just noticed it too he acts a little weird."

"Yeah," Darry paused, "well, thanks for your help. I better start on these dishes before the boss," he pointed in the direction where his wife was talking to Two-bit's girlfriend, "chews me out for leaving dirty dishes in the sink." Soda grinned at that, "ok I'm gonna get going then, see you around."

"See ya," Darry smiled.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed, favorited and followed. It really means a lot and it keeps me motivated. Here is the next chappie, enjoy:)**

On Monday Dally was at the stables as always. He tried to put out what occurred at the barbeque as much out of his mind as he could. He was met by Johnny. "Hi Matt," Johnny smiled, walking up to Dally, "we got a new horse today. Let me show you." They went to the stalls. There Dally saw the new horse right away. She was sort of whitish-grayish with white spots. "This is Grace" Johnny announced, patting the horse. The horse looked up, as if she understood they were talking about her, and made a loud noise. "So I'm gonna ride her for a little while get her ready for the kids." With that Johnny took the reins, and led the horse outside. He climbed on the horse and gave her a little kick with his feet while pulling the reins. The horse started walking, then she started going quite fast. Dally was standing by the door watching Johnny ride.

All of the sudden the horse picked up the pace and started galloping. Johnny pulled the reins. The horse rose on her rear legs making noises. There was foam around her mouth. She started trying to kick Johnny off. He tried to hold on. Oh, no, Dally started running in Johnny's direction hoping he could calm the horse down. Before he could reach though, the horse gave one final kick and Johnny flew off and onto the ground. He fell onto his stomach face down. He was quite a distance ahead and it took a few minutes for Dally to reach him.

When Dally finally got there Johnny was unconscious. Dally was not the one to panic easily, but he was panicking right then. What should he do? Should he run to the office and try calling the ambulance? But he couldn't just leave Johnny there. So he grabbed Johnny bridal style and carried him to the bench. He set him carefully on the bench then ran to the office.

"What's wrong?" Daniel was immediately alerted seeing Dally panting out of breath.

"It's Johnny, I mean Jonathan, he fell off the horse, he is unconscious, I need to use the phone to call the ambulance." Dally said in one breath, grabbing the receiver.

After Dally called the ambulance he ran back to the bench, and sat down next to Johnny. Thank God he fell onto his stomach, Dally thought, if he fell on his back he would've broke his back for sure. Johnny's face was bleeding, and Dally tried to wipe the blood off with the sleeve of his shirt.

Finally, the ambulance arrived. When they got to the hospital, Johnny was put on a gurney and wheeled away, leaving startled Dallas in the waiting room. He wished he could call Darry or Soda, but he didn't have the phone number, and they were at work anyway. The wait seemed to take forever. Dally got up from his seat and started pacing the room.

Finally the doctor walked out, and talked to Dallas. Johnny had a really bad concussion. "But he's going to be ok, right?" Dally's voice quivered as he spoke.

"If there are no complications he should be ok after a while." How long is a while, Dally thought, and what complications can arise?

"Can I see him?" Dally asked desperately, taking a step forward.

"I don't think it's a good idea," the doc replied, "he is delirious," then he looked up at Dally, "by the way do you know anyone named Dallas? He keeps calling for Dallas in his delirium". Dally bit his bottom lip, "no," he forced himself to say, "I don't know anyone by that name." He leaned against the wall, because he didn't trust himself to stand straight without support. He felt as if it was twelve years ago all over again, no, it can't be happening, he thought, he can't lose Johnny for the second time. He wouldn't be able to survive if he lost him. He felt anguish and agony, he felt like he was going to explode – silent tears rolling down his face, feeling like the green walls of the waiting room were closing in on him, he felt like he was suffocating.

For the rest of the day Dally stayed in the waiting room. He did not eat anything and did not even go for a smoke, which was really difficult for him, but he thought what if the doc walks in while I'm smoking outside. So he did not smoke. However, there was no good news - Johnny was still unconscious and delirious.

When it started to get dark Dally thought he should let Darry and the guys know what had happened. He didn't have their phone number so the only way he could let them know was in person. His car was back at the stables since he rode to the hospital in an ambulance so now he had no choice but to take the bus or walk.

Finally, he arrived at Darry's house. He rang the bell. In a few minutes there were footsteps, and then Darry opened the door. He raised his eyebrows seeing Dally's disheveled appearance. "Hi Matt… what brings you here?" Then added, "Is everything ok?" Dally did not trust himself to speak.

"It's … Jonathan," Dally chocked up, "he is in the hospital." Darry took a step back, "what happened?"

"He…" Dally swallowed hard, "he fell off the horse." Darry looked devastated, he was speechless, but got a hold of himself and said, "I appreciate you letting us know, did you get a chance to talk to the doctor? "Dally nodded, his eyes wide, "He's got a concussion, the bad type - IVth degree or something. He's been unconscious the whole day and delirious. It happened this morning," he paused and licked his lips, "I spent the whole day in the waiting room, but no news."

At this time Soda walked up to the door, and saw Matt and Darry's shocked facial expression. "Hi there Matt," then he turned to Darry and asked "what's going on Dar, are you ok?" Darry walked into the house where Two-bit and Steve were having dinner, and Pony was watching TV. Darry cleared his throat, and everyone looked at him. Dallas was still standing awkwardly in the doorway. "What's wrong Darry?" Soda frowned.

"It's Johnny, he fell off the horse while at work. Matt has been there with him. He is unconscious and delirious." Soda paled, and his mouth was opened and he was gasping for air. Then he grabbed Darry's car keys – "Let's go." So they started for the hospital even though it was late already.

When they arrived the visitation hours were over, but they stayed anyway. Soda was sitting in a chair tapping his fingers, Two-bit was just sitting hanging his head. Steve with a defeated expression on his face, Pony pale, and Darry clenching his jaw looking frustrated but stoic at the same time. Dally stayed too. None of the guys seemed to care or think that it was weird considering that Dally, well, Matt was just a coworker.

From the hospital Darry called Johnny's wife and explained what had happened. She started crying, and was going to go to the hospital right away, but Darry convinced her to wait till the morning, explaining that the visitation hours were over and she wouldn't be allowed to see Johnny anyway.

In the morning around 9 a.m. Johnny's wife Laura was entering the hospital waiting room. She spotted Darry and the rest of the guys right away. She walked up to Darry, "any news?" Darry shook his head. Laura looked like she was crying a lot. Her eyes were blood shot. She sat down in one of the chairs and hung her head. "I don't know how this could happen," she sobbed, "he is really good with horses."

"It's going to be ok," Soda put a comforting hand on her shoulder. She sobbed again.

Around 10:30 a.m. the doctor showed up. "Can we see him?" Darry asked even before the doctor had a chance to speak, anxiousness in his voice.

"No," the doctor sighed, "sorry, but he is not doing well, he started having seizures."

"What does it mean?" Darry asked curtly, and Soda gasped for air, then said, "Can't you do something?" he sounded desperate. Dally was standing, his eyes wide, staring at the doctor like it was his last hope.

"We are doing everything we can, but seizures are a common complication after concussion." The doctor said rather dryly. Then he cleared his throat and added, "Do you know someone named Dallas? He keeps asking for him." Darry's eyes widened and he took a deep breath, "it's our friend, but he can't be here at the moment." At the mention of Dally Pony shot Soda a worried look, but Soda just shrugged and mouthed "I dunno." As for Dally, it took him all the effort not to show what he was feeling, he felt like he was losing all control, like he was going to collapse right there and then.

In the afternoon they were finally allowed to see Johnny. They walked in - Pony leading the way and Dally all the way in the back. Johnny's eyes were closed, but then he opened them. He looked at Pony and gave him a weak smile. Pony walked up to his is bed and grabbed his hand, "You are going to be ok, you'll be alright." Pony said in a soothing voice. Laura walked up on the other side of the bed and grabbed his other hand. She was sobbing. "Don't cry," Johnny said weakly, patting her hand. "It's going to be alright." Then he turned to Pony and said,

"Sorry," and coughed a little.

"What?" Pony asked.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to worry you all." Johnny's voice sounded really weak, and it looked like it was difficult for him to keep his eyes opened.

"Don't say that," Soda hushed him.

Dally was watching the whole thing, feeling sweat dripping down his spine. He was getting really emotional. At this moment Johnny shot him a knowing look and started saying "Dal…"and lifting his head off the pillow, but he did not finish the word, all of the sudden his whole body started shaking and his eyes rolled up.

"Oh, God," escaped Darry's lips. Pony sprinted out the door. He found the doctor "Doctor, doctor Johnny is having another seizure." The doctor looked up at Pony and followed him into Johnny's room. "Ok, I will take it from here, if you could leave please."

As they exited the room Dally felt his mouth dry, it seemed that Johnny knew who he was. He was looking right at him when he said 'Dal'. Is it possible that he figured it out? If so he must be really mad at him.

The next day Dally had to go to work. Someone had to take care of the horses. He did everything on autopilot, his mind preoccupied with Johnny. In the evening he went back to the hospital. The guys and Laura were still there. "So how is he? Were you able to see him?" Dally asked. Darry glanced at him and there was fear in his eyes, "he was getting better," he paused, and Dally sighed with relief, "but then…," Darry continued, "he went into a coma." Dally's knees buckled, and he slumped into a chair. He paled and covered his face with his hands. Darry looked at him weird. After all he was just a coworker. "Are you ok, Matt? Perhaps you shouldn't be here. You must be tired after work." Darry placed his hand on Dally's shoulder and he realized that Dally was shaking.

Dally realized that it might seem weird to them, but there was no way he was leaving now. "Well," he said sternly and looking Darry right in the eyes, "when I got here I didn't know anyone, and Jonathan really helped me out, he showed me around, helped me on the job, introduced me to you. I feel like I owe him. If you don't mind I'd like to stay, see how he is doing."

"Of course we don't mind," Darry replied, "if you insist you can stay."

So Dallas stayed. He was sitting in his chair sweating profusely. His Johnny, the one that was given back to him was in the hospital again, in a life threatening situation. So where is God now, he thought bitterly. Maybe his whole getting religious was just a joke.

In the meantime Pony was pulling Soda aside. They went into a hallway. "Are you thinking what I am thinking?" Pony asked, his eyes huge. Soda nodded, baffled, "that it may after all be Dallas. The way he cares about Johnny. There is no way that some stranger who just met him at work would care so much. Sure we hung out a few times, but that's not the same." Pony nodded, furrowing his eyebrows, "but if it's Dally, why the hell would he disguise himself, why wouldn't he want us to know that he is alive?" Pony sounded confused and even a little mad.

"Beats me," Soda shrugged. Then he added firmly, "Well, the most important thing now is Johnny's recovery, but after he recovers we oughtta see through what the deal is about Dally." Pony looked up at Soda, "Johnny said Dallas had a birthmark on his knee or something he was going to make him wear shorts so he could see if Matt has it."

"Alright," Soda nodded, "let's get back there before they start asking questions." With that the two headed back to the waiting room.

Johnny was in a coma for two days during which Dallas thought he himself was going to die from all the emotions and fear that he was feeling. The wait was agonizing. On the third day Johnny finally woke up. "Well, the worst is behind us," the doc said when he talked to them.

"No kidding," Darry said under his breath, rolling his eyes, "even I could've told you that."

"You can see him if you'd like," the doc continued, "just don't make abrupt or sudden movements, it may make him dizzy."

They walked into Johnny's room. "Hi Johnny," Soda started in a voice that was a little too cheerful, like he was forcing himself to sound cheerful. Johnny ignored him, and was staring at Dallas intensely. 'Don't say it, just don't say it' Dallas thought. Johnny started to say something, but all of the sudden he paled, "I think I'm going to be sick." Soda quickly grabbed the garbage can and held it up while Johnny threw up. "Sorry," he mumbled clearly embarrassed.

"That's alright Johnny," Soda grinned at him, "Just do us a favor, get better."

"Yeah man," Pony added, taking a step forward.

They stayed a little longer, and Dally caught Johnny staring a few more times, but he didn't say anything. After a while they realized that Johnny was getting tired, and Darry said they should go.

Johnny stayed at the hospital till the end of the week. He was getting better - no more seizures but still threw up a few times. The doc said that from now on there was nothing to do but wait, that over time it would just get better. They discharged him on Friday telling him not to get on a horse for at least two weeks, not to do any heavy lifting, not to make any abrupt or sudden movements.

Johnny was now almost convinced that Matt was in fact Dally. He saw the pained facial expression on his face while he visited him at the hospital. There was still some doubt lingering, but he was almost positive. All he had to do now was to get Matt wear shorts so he could see if he had Dally's birthmark.


	9. Chapter 9

A few weeks had passed by. Johnny recovered fully from his injury, and Dallas was beyond himself with joy, he thought that maybe God existed after all.

It was a Sunday, the sun was setting, and Johnny and Pony were sitting on the front porch smoking. Since the whole deal at the hospital all Johnny could think about was how to get Matt to wear shorts so he could see if he had Dally's birthmark. It was Summer now, and it was getting quite hot, but Matt always wore jeans never shorts. Since the time in the hospital Pony was more opened to the idea that Matt was really Dally, though he was still skeptical about it.

"So, I was thinking," Johnny inhaled the smoke and followed it with a sip of Pepsi, "I… I'm going to ask him to go to the beach with us. He'll have to wear trunks." Pony's eyes widened- "good idea," he nodded enthusiastically, "just you know…," "What?" Johnny stubbed his cigarette.

"Don't get your hopes up." Pony looked him right in the eyes. Johnny just sighed in response.

That Friday as they were working Johnny walked up to Dally and said, trying to sound casual, "The guys and me, we are going to the beach tomorrow, would you like to join us?" Dally was thoughtful for a moment. He hadn't been to the beach in forever and he was fine with that, but it meant spending more time with Johnny and not just at work but like they were actually friends.

"Sure," he replied, picking up a haystack and proceeding to carry it to the stalls, "what time are you guys going?"

"Around 10 in the morning," Johnny followed Dally to the stalls, squinting from the sun as he walked, "would you be able to meet us at Darry's?"

"Sure," Dallas replied with a small smile, while patting Misty and giving her a carrot. He was actually looking forward to spending some quality time with Johnny.

The next morning Dally was driving to Darry's house. He was smoking a cigarette, radio blasting, sunglasses replacing his regular glasses. He was in a really good mood, looking forward to spending some quality time with Johnny. He smiled, exhaled a smoke ring and turned the volume on the radio higher.

When he arrived, everyone was already there. Looking at everyone Dallas felt shook up. He felt like he was seventeen again, and all the guys were younger, and as always had gathered at the Curtis. He felt such a déjà vu. Only now the guys had wives and girlfriends, and that brought him back to reality. He sighed heavily, hoping no one noticed his discomfort.

"Ready?" Darry's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"As ready as can be," Steve replied, taking his wife's hand and pulling her closer to him.

They all got in Darry's truck. Johnny's heart started beating faster in anticipation. He wished they were there already, he couldn't take the suspense. Only minutes were separating him from confirming that Matt was in fact none other than Dallas Winston.

Finally they arrived. They got out of the truck and started walking through the sand to the water. Johnny shot Pony and apprehensive look.

"Is everything ok?" Johnny's wife, who noticed something was up, asked him.

"Oh, everything's fine," Johnny assured her. She gave him a smile, and started walking ahead barefoot, "this sand sure is hot," she said.

They found a good spot, and spread a few towels on the sand to sit on. Soda was carrying a radio. He set it on the sand and turned it on. Some Elvis song was playing. Johnny was looking at Dally, waiting for the reveal. Dally was still wearing his jeans, he started to take them off, and Johnny felt his body was trembling and he was sure that he was paler than a sheet. Finally Dally was done, and Johnny was just about to faint - his trunks, they were long, they covered the area above the knee so he couldn't see if the birthmark was there or not. Pony saw that too and instantly put a hand around Johnny's shoulder preventing him from falling over.

"Want to check out the water?" Dally grinned at Johnny, shielding his eyes from the sun with his hand. Johnny could hardly move, he felt like he was hypnotized.

"Not yet," he mumbled and sat down on a towel, looking down. Dally gave him a weird look but didn't say anything. He didn't really care to go into the water if Johnny was not following him, but now that he said he was going in the water he had to.

In the meantime Johnny was panting, looking at Ponyboy, "I can't believe it, who on earth wears trunks this long." He picked at the sand with his hand, disappointment written all over his face.

"Do you think he did it on purpose so you can't see?" Pony asked carefully, propping his head on his hand.

"Nuh," Johnny shook his head, "I don't think so." At this moment Darry, who already went for a swim, came back to where Pony and Johnny were sitting. "You two are trying to get burned or something?" he chuckled.

"I think we should go for a swim before they realize something is wrong." Pony started getting up from his seat.

"Yeah, ok." Johnny nodded. With that Pony and Johnny went into the water.


	10. Chapter 10

From that day on Johnny was trying to come up with a plan on how to make Matt, who he was sure was Dally, wear shorts. Finally he decided to pretend that they got to wear a uniform. He went to the store and got two black t-shirts and gray shorts.

On Monday when Dally showed up, Johnny, who was already there and was wearing the "uniform", met him at the gate. "I have some news," he cleared his throat. Dally looked up at him, "What?"

"We got to wear a uniform now. Daniel told me this morning." Johnny held up the t-shirt and the shorts, he really hoped his plan would work.

"That is the ugliest thing I've ever seen," Dally replied, walking through the gate and towards the pantry. Johnny couldn't help it but think that this was so Dally. His attitude was still there.

Johnny followed after Dallas, "uniform" in hand.

"I'm not wearing this," Dally declared, opening a Pepsi bottle and taking a sip.

"You got to," Johnny tried to insist.

"Not till Daniel gets his ass here and forces me, I ain't wearing this." Dally scowled. Johnny bit his bottom lip, perhaps he should've bought something nicer.

"Alright," he sighed, "suit yourself." With that he turned around and went to the stalls and started washing Misty, thoughts about Dally racing trough his mind.

In the evening Pony, who knew about Johnny's plan, called him up. "How did it go?"

"Like shit," Johnny spat, and Pony smiled - Johnny was not the one to talk like this. "What happened?"

"He didn't go for it, just said he wasn't wearing the damn thing," Johnny raised his voice a little.

"Calm down, we'll think of something else."

"It's all my fault, I should've bought something nicer, but I thought the stuff looked like a uniform. I'm out of ideas man, I dunno what to do."

The next day Johnny noticed when Dally was standing in front of the barn smoking a cigarette, Johnny grabbed two buckets of water and started walking towards Dally. This was his last resort, if this didn't work he didn't know what he was going to do. When he was really close to where Dally was standing, he pretended to trip and fall, water splashing all over Dally's pants. Dally stepped backwards annoyed look on his face, then seeing Johnny on the ground his expression softened, "are you ok man?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Johnny managed, "sorry I spilled the water on your jeans."

"Don't worry about it," Dally said between drags on his cigarette. Then he bended over and rolled his jeans up. Johnny froze, he was afraid to look, what if the birthmark was not there, what if he made the whole thing up. Finally he made himself look - there it was, right above the left knee a birthmark shaped as a star.

Johnny was still on the ground and he felt his whole body tremble unable to get up. "What's wrong?" Dally croaked, stubbing his cigarette and walking over to Johnny.

"I … I just hit my ankle, and it hurts a little," Johnny mumbled the first thing that popped up to his mind.

"Here," Dally stretched his arm, and Johnny grabbed it hoping Dally does not realize he was shaking.

"Are you ok?" Dally repeated again when Johnny was up. Johnny didn't trust himself to speak so he just nodded and took out a pack of cigarettes.

Johnny was choking on his cigarette a lump in his throat. It was Dally, it was really him, Johnny wanted to cry and laugh at the same time, he wanted to run up to Dally and hug him to his heart's content. He could barely control himself, but then the thought stroke - if it's Dally why is he hiding, why did it take twelve years to show his face in Tulsa, why didn't he let them know that he was alive back then, twelve years ago?

Johnny could hardly manage through the rest of the day. Finally it was time to close up. "See you tomorrow," he managed to say to Dally, walking towards his car. He drove directly to Pony's place. Pony's girlfriend opened the door. She gave a glance over Johnny. "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"I might just have," Johnny managed, looking up at her from under his bangs. Pony walked up to the door. "What's going on?" he asked shooting Johnny a worried look.

"I need to talk to you," Johnny said still in the doorway.

"Get in, take a seat," Johnny walked in and plopped into a chair.

"I'll make you some ice tea," Pony's girlfriend said and went into the kitchen.

Johnny was out of breath, he was panting. "Did you run here or something?" Pony took a chair and sat down across from Johnny.

"No,… it's him, it's Dallas I'm sure of it." Johnny exhaled all in one breath.

"Calm down, tell me what happened." Pony said, wide-eyed.

"I saw it, the birthmark he has it. It's Dallas man." Johnny's voice trembled as he leaned deeper into the chair.

"How'd you…" Pony started, but Johnny interrupted him, "I pretended to slip while carrying two buckets of water, it splashed on his jeans, and he rolled them up. The birthmark the exact same one it's there. It's Dally I'm telling you man." Johnny swallowed hard.

Pony looked puzzled but shocked at the same time. "So it's really Dally?" he said still a little disbelief in the tone of his voice.

"Yeah I'm telling you man. I wanted to confront him there and then, but then thought maybe we should first figure out why he doesn't want us to know it's him." He cleared his throat, "can I have something to drink, my mouth is dry." At this moment Pony's girlfriend walked into the room, she was carrying a tray with a pitcher and two glasses. She set it on the table. "Some ice tea for you two," she smiled.

"Oh, I thought I wasn't going to make it to the end of the day alive." Johnny took a sip of ice tea. "It was killing me, it still is. So now we have to figure out why he is hiding. I'll think of something." Then he put his glass with ice tea down, "I need something stronger." Pony chuckled and went to the liquor cabinet. He poured Johnny a glass of bourbon. "Here," he smiled in spite of himself – Johnny usually was not the one drinking alcohol. Johnny took the glass and drank it all in one sip, like a shot.

"It's getting late you should stay over," Pony suggested, stirring his ice tea.

"Nuh, I'll go home to think about what to say to Dally." Johnny said, getting up and placing his empty glass on the tray. "Thanks man," he added walking up to the door.

"Ok man, I'll think too. If I get something I'll let you know." Pony looked sympathetically at his friend. He felt confused and shocked at the same time – Dally was alive. That was quite a revelation, but why was he hiding?

That night Johnny couldn't sleep, all the thoughts were racing through his mind. Why wouldn't Dally want them to know that he is alive? Why didn't he let them know twelve years ago, why doesn't he let them know now? Gradually a plan started formulating in his mind.

The next day at work he tried to act casual even though it was taking tremendous effort to do so. At lunch Johnny gathered all his effort not to reveal what he was feeling. As they sat down on the bench with their sandwiches and drinks he said to Dally, "You know, my friend, the one that died, he's the one who taught me to ride. I never told you the whole story." He wanted to see Dally's reaction when he told him about Bob's murder and Windrixville, and his presumed death. He hoped that hearing this Dallas would stop the charade and would reveal himself.

As Johnny was proceeding with the story Dally turned paler and paler. "That's tough," he managed in a raspy voice when Johnny finished. Dally got another cigarette, and Johnny noticed that Dally's hands were shaking slightly as he was trying to light it up. There was an uncomfortable silence during which Johnny hoped with all his heart that Dally would just say "it's me Dallas" or something to that effect. However, Dally remained silent taking drags on his cigarette inhaling deeply.

Then Johnny said, looking Dally right in the eyes, "if you had a friend who you thought died, but then you've found out he's alive what would you do?" Dally seemed to choke on his cigarette. He realized at that moment that Johnny somehow figured him out. Part of him wanted to just tell Johnny the truth, but he thought, well, if he was mad at me before for betraying them twelve years ago, he must be even more mad now. I started this charade I have to go with it now. "I'd be very happy," he said, and then added, getting up "our lunch break time is over, time to get back to work." Johnny was disappointed and he was at his wits end as to why Dally was trying to conceal his identity. "What about," Johnny tried again, "if your friend needed you?"

"I'd be there for him," Dally replied without missing a bit and grounding his cigarette.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed, it means a lot. To my guest reviewers, thank you for your wonderful reviews, you asked me to update ASAP so I am updating. Please keep reviewing so I know you are still reading. Anyway, on to the story.**

At the end of the day Dally got into the car. He started driving and smoking. Johnny had figured him out, but how? And what's he supposed to do now? His hands were shaking as he placed them on the steering wheel. The cigarette wasn't helping. He reached into the glove compartment and took out a joint. He lit it up and inhaled deeply and pressed on the gas. He licked his lips and felt something salty. He realized the tears were rolling down his face. He mentally cursed himself and wiped the tears off. He couldn't see the road clearly through the tears.

All of the sudden he heard sirens. He didn't realize he was speeding. The officer motioned for Dally to stop the car, which Dallas did. He quickly grounded the joint and tossed it back into the glove compartment. In the meantime the officer walked up to Dally's car. He motioned for Dally to roll the window down, which he did. The officer fanned himself with his hand and wrinkled his nose, "where's the joint?" he said in a thick southern drawl.

"What are you talking about officer?" Dallas tried to play dumb, even though there was an obvious smell and smoke form the joint in the car.

"Now, you listen son," the officer continued, bending and sticking his head through the window, "you were going ten miles over speed limit, now tell me where the joint is, don't' make me get there and search you."

Dally realized that he wouldn't be able to get out of this one. He felt as if all his emotions and feelings were mixing up, and on top of that he was high. "You want the joint, here is the fucking joint," he threw the joint into the officer's face. The officer's face turned red. "Get out of the car," he yelled and opened the door of Dally's car.

Dally got out looking at the officer with distain. "Is there more stuff in the car?" "You have a chance to check and see," Dally sassed - chin up. The officer went into Dally's car and found more pot in the glove compartment. "You are under arrest." As those words pierced through the air, Dallas swung his hand and punched the officer in the gut. The officer doubled up in pain, but only for a second, then he approached Dally and tried to get his hands behind his back so he could handcuff him. Dally resisted, he was swinging his arms left and right hitting the officer when possible. The officer grabbed his stick and hit Dally over the head. Dallas stopped instantly, the cop handcuffed him and pushed him into the police car. "You are under arrest for possession of illegal drugs, driving while intoxicated and assault," the officer drawled.

At the station they asked for an ID, and Dally gave them his fake driver's license which had his name as Matthew Evans. He was not concerned in the least with what was going on around him, all he could think of was Johnny, and that Johnny somehow figured out the truth. He was led to the cell. A different police officer was now talking to him, but Dally did not even hear what he was saying. All he saw was his lips moving.

Finally the officer left, and Dally plopped onto the bench and covered his eyes with his hands. He sat like that for the entire night. The events from twelve years ago flashing in front of his eyes as if he was in Windrixville again and then at the hospital where Johnny died, only he didn't die. 'I'd give anything to have my friend back' Johnny's words flashed in his mind. I should've just told him the truth Dally thought bitterly, and now he must be really mad at me and I deserve it.

The fact that he was here in this same jail twelve years ago also didn't help matters. The place hardly changed at all – the same cell with a bench, a metal chair and a tiny desk. The same hallways with chipped green paint. Different people though, he almost expected to be seen by one of the officers he used to know twelve years ago. Being in this place made him feel weird.

In the morning the guard brought some food, and said gruffly "you'll get your phone call and after that you meet with public defender unless you have your own lawyer." Dallas remained silent and motionless so the guard had to tell him "follow me."

Dally was led down the corridor that he knew all too well, with green and white chipped paint, too narrow for two people to pass at the same time.

Dally used his phone call to call in sick. He spoke to Daniel, and said he wasn't feeling well. The guard, who was there during the phone call, rolled his eyes.

Dally hung up the phone. "Follow me," the guard barked. He led Dallas into an office where a man, who Dally realized was a public defender, was waiting for him. He got up when Dallas entered "Hi I'm Mr. O'Connor you must be Matthew." "What? Oh yeah." He's been to this place so many times before, he expected to be addressed as Dallas. Please take a seat Mr. Evans.

Dally took a seat, and stretched his legs out under the table. "So let me get started," the lawyer began, "and tell you what you options are. You are being charged with possession of illegal drugs, resisting arrest and aggravated assault."

"I know what I'm charged with," Dally snapped. The high form last night was wearing off, and he was feeling antsy. He looked past the lawyer and into the window. He so wished he was out there with Johnny and with his friends.

"Mr. Evans?" The lawyer raised his voice a little, and Dallas realized that the lawyer had asked him something.

"Huh?" Dally leaned back in a chair and crossed his arms.

"Is this your first arrest for possession?" the lawyer fixed the glasses on his nose.

"Um, yeah." Dally replied reluctantly, looking like he was bored out of his mind, he propped his head on his hand still looking out the window and not making eye contact with the lawyer.

"Ok, so here are your options," the lawyer cleared his throat, "and it didn't help that you resisted arrest and started fighting with the officer." Dally's face remained stern. "Ok here are your options," the lawyer repeated, shuffling the papers in front of him on the desk. "You can go to trial hoping you will not be convicted and will serve no time, which both you and me know is not going to happen since you indeed had drugs in your car. So you will indeed be convicted and you can serve anywhere from six months to a year. Another option is plea bargain. Mr. Evans, are you listening to me?"

"Of course." Dally scowled.

"So as I was saying the other option is plea bargain you plead guilty and you get the lesser sentence which in your case is six months. I think it's a good idea to take the second option."

"Sure, whatever," Dally nodded, finally looking the lawyer in the eyes, contempt in his look. He'd been to this place many times before. He knew how the whole thing with plea bargain worked.

"Mr. Evans," the l lawyer sounded a little aggravated, "this is serious business, I'd like it if you took it more seriously."

"Don't worry you still get paid," Dally shot him a glare. "I take the six month, plead guilty," he then added. "Can I go now?" He looked like he was losing his patience.

"Ok, ok Mr. Evans," the lawyer rushed to say, "I'll talk to the prosecutor today." The guard walked in and took Dally back to the cell. The following day he was transferred to the town jail downtown.

In the meantime Johnny learned from Daniel that Matt called in sick. Johnny was worried. He called Dally's home but needless to say Dally didn't pick up since he wasn't there. That made Johnny really worried. This went on for a week, and Johnny considered going to Dally's apartment.

During this week Dally did a lot of thinking. There was so much free time in prison. There was nothing to do but think. He barely ate and he lost weight. He felt like he was tortured by guilt. Finally he decided to write a letter to Johnny telling him the truth. He sat down in a harsh metal chair behind a tiny metal desk and started writing: _Dear Johnny_….


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you everyone for your great reviews, here is the next chappie:)**

On Friday since Dally was still absent from work, and Johnny still couldn't reach him on the phone he decided that he would go visit him on Saturday. He got home tired after a busy day at work handling all the tasks alone, but more than that he missed Dally's company. The day went by much quicker and the tasks seemed easier when there was someone to talk to and joke around with.

"How was your day?" Johnny's wife gave him a peck on the cheek.

"Could be better," Johnny sighed. Johnny went to the fridge to get something to eat when his wife called out to him, "I checked the mail there is a letter for you."

"Who is it from?" Johnny yelled back pouring himself a glass of wine.

"It says Federal prison."

"What?" Johnny raised his eyebrows. He went into the other room wine forgotten. Then he saw the envelope. He could recognize that handwriting from anywhere. He ripped the envelope open, feeling his eyes get misty before he even started reading.

"Is everything ok?" His wife frowned.

"Yes, no, I don't know," Johnny wiped his eyes. "I'll explain later, I just need to be alone for a moment." With that he went into the bedroom. He unfolded the letter and started to read:

_Dear Johnny,_

_It's me, Matt. I am writing to you because I have a lot on my mind, and I need you to know. You see my name is not really Matt. I think you somehow figured it out. It's me - Dallas and yes I am alive. I owe you and the gang an apology. You see I survived those long awful twelve years ago. But I thought that you died, and I just couldn't face the gang without you. I couldn't t walk the same streets that we walked together, go to the lot to the arcades. I know it was selfish but I had to get away so I let everyone think that I died and went back to New York. I was miserable and I must assure you there was not a night when I didn't think of you and the gang. I thought of going back to Tulsa so many times, but I was sure I wouldn't be wanted. I betrayed the gang by leaving, I let them down. I couldn't show my face now. Finally I got news that my mother passed away so I had no choice but to go to Tulsa to attend the funeral, but I had to disguise myself since as I said before I was ashamed to show my face. When I found out that you are alive I thought I was going to lose my mind, that's the truth Johnny. So I just decided to stay and to get close to you. I am now in jail, got picked up for smoking pot, there is a lot of time to think here, and I decided that I cannot keep the charade any longer. If you and the guys are mad at me and never want to speak to me again I understand, hope you get this letter soon,_

_Dally._

When he finished reading the letter he buried his face in his hands and bawled. His wife entered the room, "Johnny what's going on, tell me."

"I'm sorry, I'll explain later." He grabbed the letter and the car keys and drove straight to Pony's place. It was around 8 p.m. on a Friday night so there was a good chance that Pony and his girlfriend were out. I should've called, Johnny thought but it was too late now.

Soon he was there. Pony opened the door - apparently him and his girlfriend were having Friday night dinner. It smelled of spaghetti and meatballs, and Johnny saw a bottle of champagne in an ice bath on the table.

"What's wrong?" Pony raised his eyebrows seeing his friend's tear stricken face.

"Sorry to interrupt your dinner but I… I," he choked up and couldn't continue, "here," he finally managed handing Pony Dally's letter.

"Johnny you are scaring me, please come in and calm down." Pony looked at him wide-eyed.

"Hi Jenna," Johnny mumbled walking in, "sorry to interrupt I …"

"Is everything ok?" she asked worriedly. Johnny nodded, taking a seat on the couch and leaning in deep into the cushion, "it's more than ok, it's great."

In the meantime Pony was reading the letter. He got pale by the time he finished it. He looked shocked and speechless.

"What's going on? You guys are scaring me." Jenna looked at Johnny then at Pony, whose hands were now shaking holding the letter.

"Remember I told you about a friend we had who died back twelve years ago. When, you know, the whole mess happened?" Pony said, carefully folding the letter and giving it back to Johnny.

"Yeah, his name was Dallas right?" Jenna walked over to where Pony was standing.

"Yeah, that's right, well it turns out that Matt - the guy from Johnny's job that hung out with us a few times, that it's really him, it's Dallas. He is alive." Pony almost whispered the last part. She looked confused, "but wouldn't you recognize him?"

"He changed a lot and he also disguised himself." Pony explained, then he added "I can't wait to tell Darry and the others."

The next day Pony and Johnny told the rest of the guys. They all gathered together and Pony read the letter out loud. Johnny tried reading it to them, but his voice was too shaky and he was choking up, so Pony read instead. Needless to say everyone was shocked. "I knew something was odd about him," Darry stated, "but I would never, and I mean NEVER think it was…Dallas, shit I still can't believe it."

"Cool ol' Dally, fooled me for sure," Two-bit chuckled, then he looked at Pony and his eyes were serious for once "poor guy, he mustta been goin' through hell trying to pretend like that." Pony looked over at Soda. Soda was wiping his eyes. His lips were curved in a smile but his eyes were all wet. Steve put a hand on Soda's shoulder, "it's ok man," he tried to calm Soda down, but his own voice was shaky and he was pale.

"Johnny had known it all along," Pony said, "he just didn't want to tell everyone before he knew for sure."

"How'd you figure it out?" Two-bit asked, looking at Johnny expectantly.

"I just had a feeling, and then I saw his handwriting and also he has a funny shaped birthmark above his left knee." Johnny's voice was shaking as he spoke. Then he looked at Darry and added, "I think we should go visit him in jail."

The following day the gang drove to the town jail downtown. They were greeted by the very unfriendly guard.

"We are here to visit D… Matthew Evans," Johnny managed to say stepping up closer to the guard's desk.

"We can take only three at a time," the guard mumbled, not looking up from the papers on his desk, it looked like he was talking _at_ them rather than _to_ them.

"Ok," Darry pursed his lips, "Johnny, Pony and Soda, you guys go."

"Ok," Johnny nodded, walking ahead.

They were led into a small room with a desk and chairs on both sides. They sat down, and soon the guard brought Dallas in. He was not wearing glasses, and the difference was striking. You could actually recognize his facial features as Dallas. Johnny felt his heart beat faster. The guard left them, and went into the corner of the room. Dally's eyes were huge, and he looked like he was about to pass out.

Johnny couldn't find the strength to talk. Finally he managed a weak "Hi,"

"Hi," Dallas responded, the look in his eyes was nothing short of bewilderment. "So," Johnny leaked his lips, "we got your letter." Dallas remained silent, he shifted in his seat, finally his eyes connected with Johnny's he then said "are you … mad?" This wasn't exactly the place to have such an important conversation about Dally walking off on the gang twelve years ago. No, this was not the place or time to talk about it, yet here they were talking about it. "Mad?" Johnny stretched his arm and grabbed Dally's hand on top of the table, "I'm …," he appeared to choke up, "I'm not mad. I'm just so glad you are … alive." He looked up at Dallas and saw silent tears trolling down Dally's cheeks. There was anguish and despair in Dally's eyes. Tears welled up in Johnny's eyes as well.

"We… are not mad. You thought Johnny was dead," Pony finished Johnny's sentence since Johnny clearly wasn't able to talk. "We are not mad," Sod a nodded. "You shouldda seen our faces when we read that letter," he chuckled, and Dally managed a weak smile. Then he turned to Johnny, "you figured it out though haven't you?"

"Yeah," Johnny smiled through his tears.

"How?" Dally wondered.

"Little things," Johnny wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt, "first you had the same favorite cigarettes and drink. Then that time when you visited my house you called me Johnny and then I saw your handwriting when you filled out the papers at work."

"You recognized my handwriting?" Dally raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah," Johnny said in a scratchy voice. "And then you have a birthmark right above your left knee that's shaped like a star." Dally chuckled, "you know my birthmark?" Johnny nodded smiling.

"So that's why you threw two buckets of water on me so I'd roll up my jeans?" Johnny nodded. It was Dally's turn to chuckle. "That was pretty smart I have to admit."

"I can't believe it Dal," Johnny squeezed Dally's palm in his. "When I saw that letter I thought I was gonna die." At this moment the guard walked up to them. "Time," he said dryly. "Ok," Johnny sobbed not taking his hand out of Dally's "we'll visit you every week." With that they left.

"How did it go?" Darry, who was waiting upfront with Steve and Two-bit, asked. "Better than I thought it'd go," Soda replied smiling and motioning with his eyes at Johnny who was wiping and wiping the tears away, but more tears were coming. Pony's eyes were misty too. "I'm really glad he got jailed up," Two-bit managed, and everyone gave him a weird look. "You know," he said, "not that he actually got jailed up, but if he didn't he wouldn't have written that letter."

"Yeah, yeah whatever you say," Steve laughed. Soon they piled up into the truck and went home.


	13. Chapter 13

Epilogue

Dally stayed in jail for the next six months. The guys visited him every week. After he got out he visited his girlfriend, and found out that she actually was not married, and the two of them got together again. She almost died of shock when he showed up. Dally continued working with Johnny at the stables, but now under his real name and he couldn't be happier.

Darry and his wife had a daughter. They named her Ashley. Darry's boss retired, and Darry used his savings and a loan to buy the company out. He now owned it.

Soda and Steve now owned the DX. Soda was married to the girl he dated after Sandy. Her name was Tiffany. Steve was married to Evie and they had a baby boy.

Johnny couldn't be happier working side by side with Dallas, and he was happy in his family life too. Him and his wife Laura were expecting their first child.

Ponyboy continued working as a social worker on the poor side of town, mostly helping out troubled teens in the area. He got quite a reputation, and all the guys were really proud of him. He married his girlfriend Jenna.


End file.
